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jokes of the day:
Protection:
Once upon a time, Little Red Riding Hood's mother (being concerned about the increase in violence in rural America) gave Little Red a .45 caliber gun for protection. Little Red kept this gun in her basket.
One summer day while on the way to her grandmother's house, a big bad wolf jumped out from behind a tree and howled to her, "I'm going to screw your brains out!"
Little Red pulled out her gun from the basket and calmly replied, "Oh no you're not, you're going to eat me like the story says."
This lady that was wearing a tight skirt was waiting at the bus stop to get onto the bus. A bus pulled up and the driver opened the doors. she tried to step up onto the step but her skirt was too tight. So she reached back to unzip and loosen it a little. she tried to step up onto the steps again. But it was still to tight. She reached back and unzipped some more. Tried to step up again and the skirt was still to tight. She tried one more time. She reached back and unzipped some more. And she still couldn,t get up onto the bus. So this man behind her reaches and grabs her by the butt. He gives her a boost onto the bus. She turns around and slaps him and saying "What do you think you are doing." Well the man says "Well lady after you unzipped my pants for the third time I thought we was aquainted."
Q: What is the best way to force a man to do sit-ups?
A: Put the remote control between his toes.
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