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jokes of the day:
Generous Offers:
John and his wife Mary were having a shower together in their upstairs bathroom when the doorbell rang. Mary heard the bell, got out of the shower, wrapped a towel around her, went downstairs, and opened the door.
Their neighbor Charlie looked at her from the doorway, and said, "Oh. I see that I got you out of the shower. Sorry about that."
"That's all right," Mary said, "What do you want?"
Not too much... my goodness you have beautiful skin. It's so pink from the shower. Mary, if I was to give you a hundred dollars, would you remove the towel from your upper body?"
Mary thought about it for a minute, figured why not, for a hundred bucks, and removed the towel from her breasts.
"Wow," Charlie exclaimed, "they are truly beautiful. Listen, for another hundred bucks would you consider taking the towel all the way off?"
"Why not," Mary thought, "that's a lot of money," and she dropped the towel completely to the floor.
Charlie had a good look, complimented her again on her fine looking body, reached into his pocket, took out two hundred dollars, gave it to her, and left.
As she got back up stairs and was getting back into the shower, John asked her who was at the door.
"Just Charlie," she said, as she started to rub his back.
"Charlie Eh," said John, "Did he give you the two hundred dollars he owed me?"
---
Heritage:"How do you account for this?" the doctor asked the brothers.
"It's hereditary, sir," the older one replied.
"I see," said the doctor, writing in his file. "Your father is the reason for your elongated penises?"
"No, sir. Our mother."
"Your mother? You idiot, women don't have penises!"
"I know, sir," replied the recruit, "but she only had one arm, and when it came to getting us out of the bathtub, she had to manage as best she could."
---
Play Carnival:PICKUP LINE:
Hey baby, wanna play carnival? That's where you sit on my face and I guess your age and weight.
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